I’ve never actually sat down and ranked the Star Wars movies before. Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker earned $20.074 million on Tuesday for a $226.847 million five-day total and a global cume of around $481 million as of last night. Since it should be passing $500 million by the end of this sentence, why not today? A few disclaimers: This will only deal in theatrical released (sorry Ewoks) and live-action (the Clone Wars movie had to die so that the Clone Wars TV show could live forever) Star Wars films.
It is worth noting, without getting into “Star Wars fatigue” or any such thing, that we’ve had five Star Wars movies from Walt Disney in just four years, nearly doubling the six that were available prior to the release of Star Wars: The Force Awakens in December of 2015. That’s a conversation for another day. For now, here’s the objectively correct ranking, determined by science, math and dark sorcery, of the eleven live-action, theatrically released Star Wars movies.
The Rise of Skywalker (2019)
Budget - $250 million
Domestic Box Office: $207 million-and-counting
Worldwide Box Office - $434 million-and-counting
Imagine if Batman Returns had been followed not by Batman Forever but by Batman & Robin. Imagine if Justice League spent most of its running time bouncing from one arbitrary action sequence to another and retconning plot reveals and character arcs from Batman v Superman. It’s not just that the movie walks back both Rian Johnson’s Last Jedi and JJ Abrams’ own Force Awakens while negating the entire story arc of Return of the Jedi, it’s that it spends so much time doing those things that it has no time for character interaction, forward plot or thematic coherency. It’s not much fun, it’s aggressively bad and it exists for no purpose beyond reassuring the older fans of the original Star Wars trilogy that they are still the most important fans of all.
Attack of the Clones (2002)
Budget - $115 million
Domestic Box Office: $311 million
Worldwide Box Office: $649 million
George Lucas may have brushed off talk of Phantom Menace being a disappointment, but Episode Two is clearly a reaction. As such, we have arbitrary action sequences, Padme sounding, looking and dressing more conventionally attractive and a comparative lack of controversial supporting character Jar Jar Binks. The core romance between Anakin Skywalker and Senator Amidala makes sense (it’s two sheltered young adults trying to approximate courtship) but still comes off as awkward and unromantic. Obi-Wan’s film noir side-plot is hampered by a stiffness in the storytelling. Coming half-a-year after Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone and The Fellowship of the Ring, Attack of the Clones lacks those films’ emotional oomph, but the final 40 minutes has a “get off my lawn” showmanship that redeems it as top-tier blockbuster spectacle.
The Force Awakens (2015)
Budget: $245 million
Domestic Box Office: $937 million
Worldwide Box Office: $2.068 billion
It’s a structural remake of A New Hope, to where specific plot beats (like Han Solo’s death) lose their impact because they are just following the plot outline of Star Wars. Ditto the painfully vague world-building, which negates the triumph of Return of the Jedi while offering little context for the new status quo to return the world (and the returning heroes) to their Episode IV status quo. The film looks great, it’s relatively well-paced and the new characters (Rey, Finn and Kylo) make it sing. I was down on it four years ago because I saw the writing on the wall for Hollywood franchises, I became more forgiving after The Last Jedi, but am now doubly grumpy now that I see what Abrams and friends apparently had in mind the whole time.
The Phantom Menace (1999)
Budget: $115 million
Domestic Box Office: $474.5 million
Worldwide Box Office: $1.027 billion
Unquestionably successful both commercially (it was the second-biggest global grosser behind Titanic by the end of its initial theatrical run) and culturally (it introduced an entire generation to their own Star Wars story), this first Star Wars prequel feels the most like an old-school Star Wars movie. It’s shot on film, and it has leisurely pacing that feels at peace with a 1970’s flick. Its political squabbling (concerning a virtuous leader tarred by baseless accusations of scandal so that a diabolical party could take power) was frighteningly prescient. The climactic lightsaber battle still rocks. The dialogue is still relatively painless compared to Attack of the Clones. Jar Jar Binks mostly fades into the background after his first appearance. Viewed outside of its place in pop culture, it’s a three-star sci-fi fantasy adventure.
Solo: A Star Wars Story (2018)
Budget: $275 million
Domestic Box Office: $214 million
Worldwide Box Office: $393 million
Solo’s biggest artistic strength that it’s just a polished, well-made and well-acted sci-fi action movie that happens to be a Star Wars flick, was also its commercial Achilles Heel. Replacement director Ron Howard offers a painfully unnecessary and occasionally hilariously expository “young Han Solo” movie that still manages to feel less like a Star Wars movie and more like a rollicking Indiana Jones flick. I mean that as a compliment, as the film feels less indebted to the Star Wars franchise and more referential to the films that inspired Star Wars in the first place. You can see the “good” lessons of Solo applied to The Mandalorian and its loving homages to the samurai films, westerns and heist flicks of generations past. It may not have been necessary, but Solo was a good time at the movies.
Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Budget: $200 million
Domestic Box Office: $532 million
Worldwide Box Office: $1.056 billion
How would Rogue One have played, at least in North America, had Hillary Clinton won the 2016 presidential election? The media chatter, whether or not this represented the general audience reception, looked at this “Rebellions are built on hope!” Star Wars story as a kind of “movie we need right now” just as Spider-Man was viewed as “the movie we need right now” months after the 9/11 attacks. Viewed outside the cultural context, Gareth Edwards and Tony Gilroy’s grim-and-gritty heist film, about the ragtag heroes who stole those Death Star plans from the Empire, revels in telling a more “realistic” tale of insurgency and rebellion. The characters are thin, but it’s so well-cast that it barely matters, and (at least before the conventionally rousing finale) it succeeds in telling a very different kind of Star Wars story.
Return of the Jedi (1983)
Budget: $33 million
Domestic Box Office: $309 million
Worldwide Box Office: $475 million
Richard Marquand’s Star Wars sequel is not as good as its predecessors, and it features some of the worst acting of the entire Star Wars saga in Carrie Fisher and Harrison Ford’s profoundly uninterested supporting turns. But Mark Hamill shines, the film’s Vietnam parables help sell the Ewok thing and the film’s first and last final half-hours are pretty damn terrific. The trip to Jabba’s palace is aggressively weird and violent while being allowed to eat up nearly the entire first act. And the triple-action finale features both the franchise’s best outer-space dogfight (it’s a rare moment where these battles are terrifying) and a perfectly executed finale for Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader. I’m a sucker for a good ending and Return of the Jedi is, warts and all, an excellent ending to the Star Wars saga.
Star Wars (1977)
Budget: $11 million
Domestic Box Office: $460 million
Worldwide Box Office: $775 million
Star Wars turned the B movie into the A movie. George Lucas and friends took the old-school serials and Flash Gordon-type sci-fi fantasies, applied some of-the-moment politics and new wave filmmaking tricks and came up with something that was reverential to the past and yet new to those lucky to discover it in the summer of 77. It’s probably the most copied/referenced/mimicked movie of its generation, a kind of Birth of a Nation-level blockbuster reimagining on the right side of history, that also featured groundbreaking special effects and constant visual wonders at almost every turn. It is grounded in primal storytelling and characters that became pop culture icons almost overnight. A New Hope may not be my favorite Star Wars movie, but it (after Marcia Lucas’ post-production editing) did everything right on the first try.
Revenge of the Sith (2005)
Budget: $115 million
Domestic Box Office: $380 million
Worldwide Box Office: $850 million
Equipped with most of the story he wanted to tell, two prequels to recalibrate his skill set and the pressure of pop culture competition, George Lucas nails it on the third try with this dynamite Star Wars prequel. The acting is a little stagey and the dialogue is overly expository, but Anakin’s downfall, alongside the fall of a democratic republic, is every bit as fire-and-brimstone melodramatic as it should be. The opening 23-minutes is the best action sequence of the 2000s, a “get off my lawn” aimed at Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings and The Matrix. What follows is a soaring space opera that features political commentary, dynamite lightsaber fights, a strong performance from Ewan McGregor and a “leave it all on the table” chutzpah from a director who knows it is his last time playing in this galaxy.
The Empire Strikes Back (1980)
Budget: $25 million
Domestic Box Office: $290 million
Worldwide Box Office: $548 million
Irvin Kershner’s terrific Star Wars follow-up set the template for the blockbuster sequel, not just going darker and grittier but going smaller, more intimate and more character-driven while interrogating the pure morality and wish-fulfillment fantasy of its predecessor. Luke isn’t ready to be a Jedi yet, Han isn’t quite the hero he needs to be, and the destruction of the Death Star was but a minor inconvenience to the Empire. The film subversively puts its most significant action sequence right at the start, while climaxing with a scaled-down but character-driven action finale that features an iconic Luke Skywalker vs. Darth Vader light saber duel that would soar even without the franchise-defining plot twist. The movie is rich in atmosphere, grounded in mournful contemplation and reveling in balancing sci-fi spectacle with nuanced character drama.
The Last Jedi (2017)
Budget: $317 million
Domestic Box Office: $620 million
Worldwide Box Office: $1.33 billion
Rian Johnson’s “do what you want, just come home before dark” Force Awakens follow-up is not great because it’s a Star Wars film. It reasserts Star Wars as a top-tier franchise by being the best blockbuster movie, give-or-take Mad Max: Fury Road, since The Dark Knight. It’s a visually dazzling movie, one that plays with the narratives of both Empire and Jedi while subverting our expectations. It also is a rebuttal to entertainment consumption based around “solving the mystery” or “Easter Eggs.” With the best (live-action) performance of Mark Hamill’s career, dynamite action sequences and a story that confronts and critiques Star Wars’ pop culture legacy (and its older fans) while affirming its value for today’s kids, The Last Jedi is the best movie ever made in the Star Wars saga.
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2019-12-25 16:10:09Z
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